Top 5 reasons why you stop listening

Why is it so difficult to pay attention to some people when they talk? It feels like they are trying to say something and bulb in our head goes off, after which it becomes tough to keep up.

Have there been times when you have wanted to pay attention, but were distracted by your own thoughts. Only if you could find a way to cut through the noise.

“But you never listen to me!” “Only if you weren’t so preoccupied in your thoughts”

“Why does it feel like I am speaking to a wall” “Helloooo, Will you respond?”

Few possibilities to explore,

1. People speak in a linear fashion – They will blabber thoughts as they come to their mind. There is no prioritisation of importance, sequence or categorisation. It is tough to follow their train of thought as it gets constantly derailed. They are distracted and confused, lack of clarity emanates from their being.
2. Irrelevant – When you can see that the other person is saying something for the sake of it. Or that it is not relevant to the day, the event, the place or you. You start doubting the credibility of the person to be saying what they are.
3. Tough to respond – some people are just too adamant in having their say. They make life and a 2 way conversation tough for you. You initially wan to participate but after some time you just tend to give up.
4. Victimisation – You can listen to negativity only upto a certain level. If the person portrays themselves as being a victim to certain events in life, their lack of taking responsibility hits you hard. You wish to interject and sometimes go outside your comfort to advise on certain matters, but then there’s something new that crops up every time.
5. Interruption – There is only so much of interruption that one can take. If someone constantly does it, the balance goes off. If you don’t feel valued, you don’t want to contribute towards the conversation.

Understand, learn and observe why you stop listening to someone. It will help you gain clarity about yourself and have better conversations with others.

If you have a strong relationship with the other person who need to make changes, you can let them know what can make their listening better.

Share with those you care! Comment and let me know if you encountered a different reason that made people listen less.